Tara, I watched it last night, and wow. It was so incredible. It was breathtakingly beautifully made. I loved hearing about your background, even though you've mentioned it before, the documentary really gave life to it. I love the threads that he chose to piece together to tell the story. I cried throughout the whole thing, and so many parts were so profoundly beautiful. The part where you talked about the birds from your childhood, then them sounding different in the city, then hearing them again at Richard's, then finally when you got your first farm and you all being on the mattress in a crappy house but hearing the birds finally again in a place that was your home, just.. wow. I know everyone else here thinks it too, but your story of hard work and steady progress is really beyond inspirational. I thought the documentary really showcased your(and Troy's) unrepeatable-ness. Two beautiful souls brought here on a mission to make the world a better place. My grandparents and the way they lived so authentically, meant everything to me and it's what I'm most grateful for in this life. Your granddaughter(and any future) is so so lucky to have you guys. I'm sure that girl Eva will remember those forest walks forever. This connection is every child's birthright and relatively so few experience it. I'm not sure if you saw the big news story making the rounds about the CDC's survey on teen girls? 57% feeling persistently sad or hopeless, 30% having seriously considered suicide, 18% having experienced sexual violence. The casualties of living this way are so enormous. Thank you, thank you, thank you, for being a part of the solution and showing others the way back to nature. For deciding to continue on serving the world despite the heartbreak that's been dealt to you along the way. Sending you love x and thank you again for choosing to do that documentary. <3
We’re visiting our babes grandparents so I snuck away after breakfast and curled up in bed to watch. Tara I know we all feel a beautiful connection with you on this platform and seeing you and Troy in the film was just so lovely. I can’t put my finger on why I’m so drawn to you and your content but all I can say is thank you for sharing a piece of you with us. You have a beautiful way with words, your spoken eloquence is heart warming and you inspire me daily to be more self-reliant, slow down and savour.
I love you and your vulnerability. Thank you for having the courage to share this with the world. I’ve lost touch with your stuff the last year or so because of some personal relationship heartache that made me disconnect from everything in my life that brought genuine value to me. I have honestly not realized I’ve been doing this until today. When you popped up on my Instagram this morning I was determined to watch this documentary. I signed up for abundance in bed in my half sleep state. You’ve awoken me. I left home at 17. I turned to drugs and alcohol. I got very close to taking myself from this world multiple times. During that time I craved my childhood, growing up between Philadelphia and a small farm town off the sassafras river in Maryland. I always felt content in Maryland. Being outside catching fish and frogs during the day and collecting wood for making fires at night. I’m 29 now. Pregnant with my first child. I’ve known for a long time that I’ve wanted to live like that everyday. Intertwined with life and the land. I want to raise my boy in that environment. My partner and I are also on a single budget now, like you and Troy were years ago. I feel like my goals are unfathomable. I feel useless 98% of the time since I’m barely contributing financially or in any significant way other than moral support. I don’t even know where I’m going with this at this point. Just feeling very vulnerable after watching the documentary. When you said “I think all we had to do was know what we value, and have the intention of what we wanted and allow god or whoever to figure the rest of it out” that really hit home. I’m screaming my intentions into the ether. I hope I can update you in a year or so with the beginning stories of my own homestead. 💙♥️💜💛
Tara, I just finished watching and want to say thank you to you and Troy from the deepest, most sincere place in my heart. I have been following you for around a year now and am in awe of the way you both have so painstakingly built a life of beauty and integrity. Please know there are many of us out there, watching you through your weekly essays and seeing how there is another way of life that is still possible for us too. And, thank you for helping those of us who have also lived a life petrified by death to see that a different relationship with death is possible too. Your documentary moved me to tears and my only complaint is that there wasn't more of it. I cannot wait to read your book!
I think I'm just moved by the way you live your life as a whole.
It reminds me of my grandma from the countryside, there was no one else like her, and I'm pretty sure there's no one else like you either.
Learning from you has made me feel closer to her.
What an absolute blessing your daughters and grand-daughter have to have you.
Every since I first started following you, I've been in awe of your dedication, of your deep reverence to the animals you care for and the land you live on, and of your story.
It was magical to step into your & your husband's universe.
It was inspirational beyond belief to witness you both.
I have a lot of admiration for what you both do here on this earth.
Every time I read you, it hits my heart.
You have a real talent as a writer, and your life is such an example for us all, even if we cannot live up to it.
I'm not sure what hasn't been said already, by all the wonderful subscribers you have.
I just had to add my two cents.
You and your husband are truly one of a kind and I'm so grateful I got to witness part of your daily lives.
You might have no idea how profound an impact you are having but you truly are. Words cannot express the gratitude I have for all that you do.
I had tears throughout the video, because I can feel the rawness and depth of your pain. And I wish there was something to say or do, but I know you are already doing exactly what is right for you.
The film is beautiful, an extremely well done piece that does a great job portraying this life of yours. I was astounded, not sure how to put this... I am astounded at how well I think I knew you before the film. I mean, this is quite a unique thing isn't it? We have never met, will likely never meet... yet you have shared so much and invited me (well, all of us but I'm gonna focus on myself) into so many conversations that I think, with some degree of certainty, that I know you. The film was a wonderful confirmation... In other words, and I know there are limits to this "knowing" and I want to be cautious about taking this too far, but what struck me so intensely was just how familiar all of what I saw and heard in the film was because you have done such an amazing job of inviting me into your life over the past couple years. And it has meant such a great deal to me, and so many others.
I love that the film starts with your words. I have always been drawn most to your writing, I have said before that the most apt comparison I can come up with is the impact that the words of Wendell Berry have had on me. I am moved by many things, but nothing moves me like the power of words well written, words that express deep truths that I too acknowledge or hold dear. It's remarkable, really... When that passage comes on the screen at the beginning of the film I remember in an instant those words, and I know there are dozens of other passages you have written that I would remember instantly as well. Some because they resonate with my own truth, and some, like those that start the film, because they are so powerfully connected to your experience and the journey you have shared with us.
I'll admit here that I have yet to listen to one of your T and T talks. So this was my first time really "meeting" Troy and that was a treat. You are both so generous and it's impossible not to have a very deep and abiding respect for the vulnerability and openness with which you greet life and the power of experience. I know that I am better for it, much better. In thinking about writing this feedback, which you asked for, I have been struck by the nature of all this and the role it has played in my life over the last few years. For some reason the film brings into focus just how amazing this all is... to me anyway.
We all had to find guide posts and trail markers to keep ourselves sane during the whateverdemic. We all had to find that rope, like Pa did on the prairie, to lead us back to the house from the barn in the blizzard. Slowdown was a rope for me, and at one time thats all you were, an account, on a platform. I can't retrace all the steps, but I know that piece by piece I came to understand who you were, what you had gone through, and eventually what you were trying to build here on the interwebs initially with insta and now substack. You guys have given so very very much, and I admire and appreciate your work and am grateful for its existence.
The film was more of that, yet another medium through which we are all invited to share in and take from your experience what we can. There is so much more I could say.. so much of your experience and immersion into farming resonates with my own. But, of course, thats why I'm here... much love to you and to Troy and your family and that beautiful place you call home, at least for now.
I will especially cherish the shot of you at your desk... a candle, a pen, some paper. That will be the enduring image for me as I continue to read and relish your work.
This beautiful glimpse into your lives and hearts is medicine for mine. I just finished watching, and I appreciate so much about it. Gentle warm tears slid down my cheeks the entire time. The pace and beautiful imagery alongside your grounded and comforting voice, Tara, was so warm and soothing, like the many moments of light that shone throughout this gorgeous film. I feel like you and Troy, by your example of rearranging your life around your values, by your love for one another & your girls, and your peace and connection (and commitment) to land and animals, by your willingness to feel it all, your bare open hearts, your wisdom and humility, all this is what I (and probably all of your listeners, readers and aspiring homesteaders) truly look toward with awe and gratitude. I felt your sincere affection for your mentor, Richard. I also love that you told about the moment with you & Troy being swarmed by the mysterious dragonflies and how you engaged with that wonder- that Mila given gift- I'm certain. Thank you so much for all of this. Also you and Troy are both a picture of health! Your teeth are so white and you both glow vitality. I'm going to defrost some bone broth right now for breakfast! Much love
Aaahhh, Tara and Troy. Goodness, me oh my. My heart is filled with joy and wonder. — It was a photo of you two that first gut punched me as I scrolled through IG way back when. “Hold up! Now who are these two???” Your words sealed the deal. Your musings are for me like that dragon fly. “Come back,” I implore. “This. This I know. This is familiar. This is true. More please. Come back.” Mila’s photo of you was the next time I saw your face. My mother had recently died, and I empathized deeply with Mila as you described your daughter feeling love and admiration for her gorgeous, bloodied Mama looking on at her in such a way that couldn’t not be photographed. When you went quiet, I wondered where you had gone. Yet the whole world was shifting in tectonic ways. I invested time that summer nursing a cow injured when giving birth. Ultimately, we had to put her down and your story about the bison resonated even more deeply. Our cow and her clique (four protective heifers) taught me lessons I’ll never forget. Lessons I collect along with so many that YOU, Tara Couture, have taught me. — I have experienced a lot of death in my life. To bear witness to the loss of a child. To learn of Mila’s death. Just writing that last sentence … I am hesitant to hit “Post.” My father taught me that funerals are, in many respects, to “console the consolers.” That sort of initially pissed me off the first time he explained, but I’ve come to learn it is true.
Here you and Troy are, opening yourselves up to us.
You owe nothing. No one could blame you for becoming hermits; never posting another thing ever again. And yet here you are.
Bearing your hearts, your souls, your unrepeatableness (thank you, Cassandra).
I've waited to pop in and comment here until I had the right words, but I've decided that they don't exist. Just thank you, Troy, and everyone at abundance+ for this immeasurable gift. It's invaluable. The connection that you have to each other, your animals, nature, and our inevitable mortality pours out from the screen. And, I think we all needed to take a little piece of that with us. 💚💚💚
Thank you Tara for sharing such profound parts of your life with us. I don’t know how to articulate the impact your work has had on me, but everything in my life is more vivid and meaningful these days. I’m about to go for a stroll and I know that the sun is going to feel that much warmer. ❤️
There's not much I can say to add to what has already been said...I was blown away by the delicate handling by the producers, the filmography, the music, the whole message wrapped up in a beautiful, honest package. The topic of life & death is avoided by so many (myself included, unfortunately, but I'm trying to become more comfortable with it) and you & Troy have displayed a wonderful matter of fact-ness while discussing. I marveled and cried during the whole episode. Thank you so much for being vulnerable and showing us an additional sliver of your lives.
I finally got to watch this today while cuddling my newborn babe. It profoundly moved me. It was beautifully done and brought tears to my eyes. My favorite part was the dragonfly part. Years back we found out that our baby was no longer living at 22 weeks. I was devastated. I remember walking around our own farm that day. I saw more butterflies than I had ever seen and then felt as though everything would be alright. Our culture is so fearful of death. It is evident everywhere you look. From vegan diets to running to vaccines for every ailment. A deep reverence for death is the remedy for all this fear and the key to a fuller life.
Dear Tara, I come to you from Instagram. I'd been going back on whether I could afford upgrading to a paid subscription and your video finally made me take the plunge. My husband is a passive-active consumer of your content, everytime I talk about you or read him something you wrote he pays avid attention. I forget the first day I mentioned and showed him your husband but ever since, he's become loyal m, he literally asks "Tara hasn't posted her husband?" and it felt like teasing to him when he could only see profiles of Troy. When I told him you have a film out, he dropped his work and faced me aaking seriously, "do they show her husband's face?" 😅 We're finally going to watch tonight and he said to me, we have to watch with ice cream. I said why and he said because I'm gonna see Tara's husband,and I was like why would that make you cry and he says "seeing male perfection" 😅. I may laugh at and tease him about his fanboying over Troy but I would like to let you know that as someone who lost his father young and who grew up without a male model or guidance, your husband gives him hope that he can be better man, that it is possible to be the kind of man he has always imagined, for him Troy is a manifestation of his minds theoretical postulations. So thank you, for sharing him and your lives with us.
Tara, I know other people have said this as well, but I just want to encourage you that there's nothing extraneous, gratuitous or indulgent in this documentary. It is the opposite of that over-sharing (while at the same time surface level and vapid) sort of thing we've come to see in reality television and most modern documentaries. This feels, honestly, just like a beautiful space holding for grief, shared in a way that is so encouraging to the viewer----you've found the truth in it all.... That within these tragedies and within the heartache of death, there follows a true connection to life. I know for myself, I really started to live authentically after experiencing profound grief. It sounds crazy to people that haven't lived it but your story, the way you shared it, the way the film makers filmed and edited it, and the way you ALLOW for the grief to move through you... with this glimmer of hope at the end.... it's truly powerful in a way that is helpful to the viewer--- even if they don't understand it yet. They will draw on this in their own grief, some day.
When you spoke of the light coming through the clouds... It reminded me of this Cherokee phrase:
i:gagadí
This phrase is used in ritualism to connote daybreak---- but the more substantial translation means "The light that breaks at dawn and dispels the darkness".
When white men were trying to Christianize the Cherokee language, they couldn't quite understand how this phrase was applicable to ritual because it was used in a way that expressed deep spiritual connection and yet was essentially about daybreak. And so the English translation of i:gagadí became "Holy Spirit".
But I think you understand the former meaning. You express it well in your heartfelt reflection.
Tara, I watched it last night, and wow. It was so incredible. It was breathtakingly beautifully made. I loved hearing about your background, even though you've mentioned it before, the documentary really gave life to it. I love the threads that he chose to piece together to tell the story. I cried throughout the whole thing, and so many parts were so profoundly beautiful. The part where you talked about the birds from your childhood, then them sounding different in the city, then hearing them again at Richard's, then finally when you got your first farm and you all being on the mattress in a crappy house but hearing the birds finally again in a place that was your home, just.. wow. I know everyone else here thinks it too, but your story of hard work and steady progress is really beyond inspirational. I thought the documentary really showcased your(and Troy's) unrepeatable-ness. Two beautiful souls brought here on a mission to make the world a better place. My grandparents and the way they lived so authentically, meant everything to me and it's what I'm most grateful for in this life. Your granddaughter(and any future) is so so lucky to have you guys. I'm sure that girl Eva will remember those forest walks forever. This connection is every child's birthright and relatively so few experience it. I'm not sure if you saw the big news story making the rounds about the CDC's survey on teen girls? 57% feeling persistently sad or hopeless, 30% having seriously considered suicide, 18% having experienced sexual violence. The casualties of living this way are so enormous. Thank you, thank you, thank you, for being a part of the solution and showing others the way back to nature. For deciding to continue on serving the world despite the heartbreak that's been dealt to you along the way. Sending you love x and thank you again for choosing to do that documentary. <3
We’re visiting our babes grandparents so I snuck away after breakfast and curled up in bed to watch. Tara I know we all feel a beautiful connection with you on this platform and seeing you and Troy in the film was just so lovely. I can’t put my finger on why I’m so drawn to you and your content but all I can say is thank you for sharing a piece of you with us. You have a beautiful way with words, your spoken eloquence is heart warming and you inspire me daily to be more self-reliant, slow down and savour.
I love you and your vulnerability. Thank you for having the courage to share this with the world. I’ve lost touch with your stuff the last year or so because of some personal relationship heartache that made me disconnect from everything in my life that brought genuine value to me. I have honestly not realized I’ve been doing this until today. When you popped up on my Instagram this morning I was determined to watch this documentary. I signed up for abundance in bed in my half sleep state. You’ve awoken me. I left home at 17. I turned to drugs and alcohol. I got very close to taking myself from this world multiple times. During that time I craved my childhood, growing up between Philadelphia and a small farm town off the sassafras river in Maryland. I always felt content in Maryland. Being outside catching fish and frogs during the day and collecting wood for making fires at night. I’m 29 now. Pregnant with my first child. I’ve known for a long time that I’ve wanted to live like that everyday. Intertwined with life and the land. I want to raise my boy in that environment. My partner and I are also on a single budget now, like you and Troy were years ago. I feel like my goals are unfathomable. I feel useless 98% of the time since I’m barely contributing financially or in any significant way other than moral support. I don’t even know where I’m going with this at this point. Just feeling very vulnerable after watching the documentary. When you said “I think all we had to do was know what we value, and have the intention of what we wanted and allow god or whoever to figure the rest of it out” that really hit home. I’m screaming my intentions into the ether. I hope I can update you in a year or so with the beginning stories of my own homestead. 💙♥️💜💛
Tara, I just finished watching and want to say thank you to you and Troy from the deepest, most sincere place in my heart. I have been following you for around a year now and am in awe of the way you both have so painstakingly built a life of beauty and integrity. Please know there are many of us out there, watching you through your weekly essays and seeing how there is another way of life that is still possible for us too. And, thank you for helping those of us who have also lived a life petrified by death to see that a different relationship with death is possible too. Your documentary moved me to tears and my only complaint is that there wasn't more of it. I cannot wait to read your book!
Dear Tara,
I was really moved by the documentary.
I think I'm just moved by the way you live your life as a whole.
It reminds me of my grandma from the countryside, there was no one else like her, and I'm pretty sure there's no one else like you either.
Learning from you has made me feel closer to her.
What an absolute blessing your daughters and grand-daughter have to have you.
Every since I first started following you, I've been in awe of your dedication, of your deep reverence to the animals you care for and the land you live on, and of your story.
It was magical to step into your & your husband's universe.
It was inspirational beyond belief to witness you both.
I have a lot of admiration for what you both do here on this earth.
Every time I read you, it hits my heart.
You have a real talent as a writer, and your life is such an example for us all, even if we cannot live up to it.
I'm not sure what hasn't been said already, by all the wonderful subscribers you have.
I just had to add my two cents.
You and your husband are truly one of a kind and I'm so grateful I got to witness part of your daily lives.
You might have no idea how profound an impact you are having but you truly are. Words cannot express the gratitude I have for all that you do.
I had tears throughout the video, because I can feel the rawness and depth of your pain. And I wish there was something to say or do, but I know you are already doing exactly what is right for you.
Thank you for sharing yourself and your story.
The film is beautiful, an extremely well done piece that does a great job portraying this life of yours. I was astounded, not sure how to put this... I am astounded at how well I think I knew you before the film. I mean, this is quite a unique thing isn't it? We have never met, will likely never meet... yet you have shared so much and invited me (well, all of us but I'm gonna focus on myself) into so many conversations that I think, with some degree of certainty, that I know you. The film was a wonderful confirmation... In other words, and I know there are limits to this "knowing" and I want to be cautious about taking this too far, but what struck me so intensely was just how familiar all of what I saw and heard in the film was because you have done such an amazing job of inviting me into your life over the past couple years. And it has meant such a great deal to me, and so many others.
I love that the film starts with your words. I have always been drawn most to your writing, I have said before that the most apt comparison I can come up with is the impact that the words of Wendell Berry have had on me. I am moved by many things, but nothing moves me like the power of words well written, words that express deep truths that I too acknowledge or hold dear. It's remarkable, really... When that passage comes on the screen at the beginning of the film I remember in an instant those words, and I know there are dozens of other passages you have written that I would remember instantly as well. Some because they resonate with my own truth, and some, like those that start the film, because they are so powerfully connected to your experience and the journey you have shared with us.
I'll admit here that I have yet to listen to one of your T and T talks. So this was my first time really "meeting" Troy and that was a treat. You are both so generous and it's impossible not to have a very deep and abiding respect for the vulnerability and openness with which you greet life and the power of experience. I know that I am better for it, much better. In thinking about writing this feedback, which you asked for, I have been struck by the nature of all this and the role it has played in my life over the last few years. For some reason the film brings into focus just how amazing this all is... to me anyway.
We all had to find guide posts and trail markers to keep ourselves sane during the whateverdemic. We all had to find that rope, like Pa did on the prairie, to lead us back to the house from the barn in the blizzard. Slowdown was a rope for me, and at one time thats all you were, an account, on a platform. I can't retrace all the steps, but I know that piece by piece I came to understand who you were, what you had gone through, and eventually what you were trying to build here on the interwebs initially with insta and now substack. You guys have given so very very much, and I admire and appreciate your work and am grateful for its existence.
The film was more of that, yet another medium through which we are all invited to share in and take from your experience what we can. There is so much more I could say.. so much of your experience and immersion into farming resonates with my own. But, of course, thats why I'm here... much love to you and to Troy and your family and that beautiful place you call home, at least for now.
I will especially cherish the shot of you at your desk... a candle, a pen, some paper. That will be the enduring image for me as I continue to read and relish your work.
This beautiful glimpse into your lives and hearts is medicine for mine. I just finished watching, and I appreciate so much about it. Gentle warm tears slid down my cheeks the entire time. The pace and beautiful imagery alongside your grounded and comforting voice, Tara, was so warm and soothing, like the many moments of light that shone throughout this gorgeous film. I feel like you and Troy, by your example of rearranging your life around your values, by your love for one another & your girls, and your peace and connection (and commitment) to land and animals, by your willingness to feel it all, your bare open hearts, your wisdom and humility, all this is what I (and probably all of your listeners, readers and aspiring homesteaders) truly look toward with awe and gratitude. I felt your sincere affection for your mentor, Richard. I also love that you told about the moment with you & Troy being swarmed by the mysterious dragonflies and how you engaged with that wonder- that Mila given gift- I'm certain. Thank you so much for all of this. Also you and Troy are both a picture of health! Your teeth are so white and you both glow vitality. I'm going to defrost some bone broth right now for breakfast! Much love
YAAAAA GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT!!!!!!
Aaahhh, Tara and Troy. Goodness, me oh my. My heart is filled with joy and wonder. — It was a photo of you two that first gut punched me as I scrolled through IG way back when. “Hold up! Now who are these two???” Your words sealed the deal. Your musings are for me like that dragon fly. “Come back,” I implore. “This. This I know. This is familiar. This is true. More please. Come back.” Mila’s photo of you was the next time I saw your face. My mother had recently died, and I empathized deeply with Mila as you described your daughter feeling love and admiration for her gorgeous, bloodied Mama looking on at her in such a way that couldn’t not be photographed. When you went quiet, I wondered where you had gone. Yet the whole world was shifting in tectonic ways. I invested time that summer nursing a cow injured when giving birth. Ultimately, we had to put her down and your story about the bison resonated even more deeply. Our cow and her clique (four protective heifers) taught me lessons I’ll never forget. Lessons I collect along with so many that YOU, Tara Couture, have taught me. — I have experienced a lot of death in my life. To bear witness to the loss of a child. To learn of Mila’s death. Just writing that last sentence … I am hesitant to hit “Post.” My father taught me that funerals are, in many respects, to “console the consolers.” That sort of initially pissed me off the first time he explained, but I’ve come to learn it is true.
Here you and Troy are, opening yourselves up to us.
You owe nothing. No one could blame you for becoming hermits; never posting another thing ever again. And yet here you are.
Bearing your hearts, your souls, your unrepeatableness (thank you, Cassandra).
Here you both are.
Together.
Consoling us.
You came back to us. Like the dragon fly.
I've waited to pop in and comment here until I had the right words, but I've decided that they don't exist. Just thank you, Troy, and everyone at abundance+ for this immeasurable gift. It's invaluable. The connection that you have to each other, your animals, nature, and our inevitable mortality pours out from the screen. And, I think we all needed to take a little piece of that with us. 💚💚💚
Thank you Tara for sharing such profound parts of your life with us. I don’t know how to articulate the impact your work has had on me, but everything in my life is more vivid and meaningful these days. I’m about to go for a stroll and I know that the sun is going to feel that much warmer. ❤️
There's not much I can say to add to what has already been said...I was blown away by the delicate handling by the producers, the filmography, the music, the whole message wrapped up in a beautiful, honest package. The topic of life & death is avoided by so many (myself included, unfortunately, but I'm trying to become more comfortable with it) and you & Troy have displayed a wonderful matter of fact-ness while discussing. I marveled and cried during the whole episode. Thank you so much for being vulnerable and showing us an additional sliver of your lives.
I finally got to watch this today while cuddling my newborn babe. It profoundly moved me. It was beautifully done and brought tears to my eyes. My favorite part was the dragonfly part. Years back we found out that our baby was no longer living at 22 weeks. I was devastated. I remember walking around our own farm that day. I saw more butterflies than I had ever seen and then felt as though everything would be alright. Our culture is so fearful of death. It is evident everywhere you look. From vegan diets to running to vaccines for every ailment. A deep reverence for death is the remedy for all this fear and the key to a fuller life.
Dear Tara, I come to you from Instagram. I'd been going back on whether I could afford upgrading to a paid subscription and your video finally made me take the plunge. My husband is a passive-active consumer of your content, everytime I talk about you or read him something you wrote he pays avid attention. I forget the first day I mentioned and showed him your husband but ever since, he's become loyal m, he literally asks "Tara hasn't posted her husband?" and it felt like teasing to him when he could only see profiles of Troy. When I told him you have a film out, he dropped his work and faced me aaking seriously, "do they show her husband's face?" 😅 We're finally going to watch tonight and he said to me, we have to watch with ice cream. I said why and he said because I'm gonna see Tara's husband,and I was like why would that make you cry and he says "seeing male perfection" 😅. I may laugh at and tease him about his fanboying over Troy but I would like to let you know that as someone who lost his father young and who grew up without a male model or guidance, your husband gives him hope that he can be better man, that it is possible to be the kind of man he has always imagined, for him Troy is a manifestation of his minds theoretical postulations. So thank you, for sharing him and your lives with us.
Tara, I know other people have said this as well, but I just want to encourage you that there's nothing extraneous, gratuitous or indulgent in this documentary. It is the opposite of that over-sharing (while at the same time surface level and vapid) sort of thing we've come to see in reality television and most modern documentaries. This feels, honestly, just like a beautiful space holding for grief, shared in a way that is so encouraging to the viewer----you've found the truth in it all.... That within these tragedies and within the heartache of death, there follows a true connection to life. I know for myself, I really started to live authentically after experiencing profound grief. It sounds crazy to people that haven't lived it but your story, the way you shared it, the way the film makers filmed and edited it, and the way you ALLOW for the grief to move through you... with this glimmer of hope at the end.... it's truly powerful in a way that is helpful to the viewer--- even if they don't understand it yet. They will draw on this in their own grief, some day.
When you spoke of the light coming through the clouds... It reminded me of this Cherokee phrase:
i:gagadí
This phrase is used in ritualism to connote daybreak---- but the more substantial translation means "The light that breaks at dawn and dispels the darkness".
When white men were trying to Christianize the Cherokee language, they couldn't quite understand how this phrase was applicable to ritual because it was used in a way that expressed deep spiritual connection and yet was essentially about daybreak. And so the English translation of i:gagadí became "Holy Spirit".
But I think you understand the former meaning. You express it well in your heartfelt reflection.
Thank you for this beautiful vulnerability.
Just getting out some gorgeous lamb ribs to sit down with this tonight. I'm so glad you're happy with it. Another duly earned gift for the world.