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Kaelin Fleming's avatar

We harvested our beloved milk cow last night, so these images are fresh in my mind and still the feeling on my hands. We were correct in our intuition of a uterine infection, and thus did not feel right saving organs or blood this time.

I learned about some more uses for blood at the ancestral skills cow processing class I went to this March- the woman there quite creatively had made a recipe for blood ‘egg’nog and blood cookies. Both were divine, and my still-anemic body craved them on sight from then on. How do you like to use the blood?

Also, any tips on bottle feeding a 2 week old calf? We don’t want to go with replacer, but all our goats aren’t in milk until June..

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Tara's avatar

I'm sorry to hear about your cow, Kaelin. That's so hard. And dairy cows are the hardest of all. I have only had to feed a rejected calf once in all my years (knock on wood). I contacted a dairy farm near us and asked if I could get milk for my calf and the fella' let me go there every two days to get raw, fresh milk. Another option is looking for a cow in milk and putting him on her. Other than that... no tips I'm afraid. If you have to go the replacer route I would look for the highest quality possible.

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Alison's avatar

That photo of you collecting blood while Troy supports next to you, backs of your hands facing, teamwork - how beautiful. I've never met you. I've never met Mila. But I think of her almost every day. And I'll think of her, and your family, this weekend.

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Tara's avatar

Thank you so much, Alison. That means so much to me. ❤️

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Jessica Baxter's avatar

Your words Tara… even when discussing death and taking life, your words are infused with such life, they are a healing balm for the soul. 🫶🏼♥️ love to you and your family always and this weekend ♥️

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Tara's avatar

What a wonderful compliment. Thank you ❤️

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Maya B's avatar

Please do a post on the blood one day! I would love to hear all about it.

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Maya B's avatar

Thank you for sharing reality. While I work at a farmers market and do know most of the farmers I buy from; chances are pretty low that I will ever see a harvest in person. Your words are so very needed.

I know you will find Mila in the wilds this week and that your heart will be full.❤️

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Tara's avatar

Thank you, Maya.

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Diana Miller's avatar

Thank you for sharing this Tara. I feel so grateful and humbled by the reality that we can raise our animals to feed us. I love our cows. Right now we are in the field with them everyday moving them on to fresh grass. They are completely calm and trusting of me. I also know their end. I know which one we will be harvesting next. His name is Popeye and he is huge and gentle at the same time. He always comes up to me for chin scratches. My heart also dreads his last day but I am so thankful that I get to witness all his days leading up to that and see what a thriving happy cow he has been.

My heart is with you as you remember Mila this week in the wilderness.

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Tara's avatar

It is worthy of that gratitude and humility! Oh, sweet Popeye. It's always such a tear on the heartstrings when we harvest these beautiful animals. He's so lucky that he has lived as he's lived with you on your farm. That is truly honouring the gift of our nourishment.

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Louella Martin's avatar

So often I find your words render me speechless and being a writer myself, that's rare. All day I've been thinking about your essay here and something else I read this morning, different yet connected. It was about an animal sanctuary which I suppose is well and good but I think what I stumbled over is the way that life was glorified and death was so shunned. Even for 'mere' animals. (I say that as one who raises and respects animals yet I know and understand their end as well). I've long thought we as a generation are too scared of death and the thoughts in your essay confirmed my thoughts.

Life is precious but so is death in its time. Yet I also know I have experienced very little close death in my circles and I hold space and love for you this weekend especially as you grieve. May you be comforted in a small measure ❤️

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Tara's avatar

Thank you for such a grand compliment. It is so warming to read your words.

I think you've really hit on something profound here. I have felt the same way about animal sanctuaries. I think the motivations are noble, but I agree with your assessment about prolonging life at all costs. I remember a few years ago seeing a popular instagram account of an animal sanctuary where they put hats and goggles on their cows and fed them enormous Hershey bars. You could even donate money to "buy the cow a chocolate bar". It made me weep. It felt like such an abomination to me. I guess some just see it as cute or funny, but I think bovine are such beautiful creatures with such unique personalities and to see them eating processed food with clown sunglasses on made me think that place didn't understand anything at all.

But I digress... I agree with other farmers who work to allow an animal to live as rightly to its nature as possible. It's what I try to excavate in my life, a principle I try to respect in the wild and cultivate in the cultivated. ❤️

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Jeanie Taylor's avatar

Holding you in my heart this weekend and always. I will say her name.

✨️Mila✨️

Big love 💛

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Tara's avatar

❤️❤️❤️ so lovely to hear

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Marilyn Lambert's avatar

My heart is full of thoughts and prayers for you and Troy as you especially sit with thoughts of your beautiful Mila this weekend. 💕 I love the raw, honest way you write about life. The eyes to see don’t often come easily.

Never a job I looked forward to, I’m grateful to have been taught at a young age to lovingly care for your animals, and then reverently but practically butcher them to fill the freezer. I always said if I had to eat store bought meat I think I’d be a vegetarian.

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Tara's avatar

Thank you, Marilyn, for your kind words.

I am hopeful that eventually we'll get around to measuring more important things than protein and fat when it comes to the animals we eat. That soil and the health of the animal will trump macros. Until then, I'm glad there's people, like so many here, thinking about these things. You had such a wonderful upbringing (at least the parts you've shared here). 🌞

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Nourishing Circles Farmstead's avatar

The amount of raw beauty in this is papalble. The harvest, the sweat blood salt, the fireside closeness to God , to the heart beat of the earth. So many gifts in these words. Thank you. Hugs to you all and celebrating Mila in energetic form as she runs free.

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Tara's avatar

Thank you, Tawny 💕

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Ariel's avatar

May the wild comfort you this weekend, and I thank you for your generosity of words that bring comfort as you begin a solemn weekend. 🍃🌿❤️

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Tara's avatar

Thank you, Ariel.💕

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Open Road Ranch's avatar

Beautiful thoughts and words from you as always. Sending love to you and Troy and Mila.

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Rosie Sill's avatar

These words - the feelings that stir within my heart - resonate to the very depth of my soul. You have spoken what I feel, what I see, what I know. Such beauty, dear friend (in some realm our spirits must dance). Thank you for always reminding me of who I am and that I am not alone in this knowing.

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Tara's avatar

Beautiful. Thank you, dear heart❤️

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Jenelle's avatar

Wow yes! We are all here because our ancestors knew their role and duty! How cavalier we are to disdain it! What do you use the blood for? How long does it take you to go through the guts. It seems there must be a lot of preparation for an animal this large.

Sending love to you all and Mila! I’m sure she is waiting there!

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Tara's avatar

I used to make blood sausage but this go around I’m freeze drying it and going to add to my mushroom spice and encapsulate some to take in times of depletion.

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Chelsea's avatar

Beautiful post. Thank you for sharing. 💘 thinking of you all this weekend and your sweet Mila.

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Tara's avatar

Thank you, Chelsea.

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Megan Miller's avatar

Read this one aloud to my fam over breakfast before heading into another day. This was such a beautiful essay. Thank you for it. “That dash is now.”

Holding Mila and you all in my heart ✨

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Tara's avatar

I’m honoured. Thank you❤️❤️

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Cheri Willard's avatar

Thank you, Tara...

My heifer had her calf last.week. We banded him. How many months old was this steer? You are giving me the strength to keep him to process ourselves... I'm not there just yet but it's an important option. Hugs to you and Troy thus weekend.

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Tara's avatar

I wouldn't harvest based on age, but on a proper "finish". You can do some research on how to learn to 'see' what's going on under that hide. Nothing is worse than harvesting an unfinished animal and ending up with a poor eating experience. This fella was three.

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